Tonight was the big meditation.
I brought to me and asked every one of the below, individually, to join my coming meditation and help me in whatever way they could. They all agreed.
The meditation was using a tool IG via a new guide named Ronan gave me, that “plugged into” my solar plexus chakra and provided a much better/stronger connected me to ‘all of many parts/aspects’ of me — so that I would be better able to align them within me.
This is in part to help deal with my sense of profound inner-resistance, to the degree of suicidal sabotage and more: last night’s meditation (“Dominants”) essentially told me that I have absorbed a great deal of new energy over time but had not aligned it under my singular will or autonomy.
Taan. Ray. Jared and El Nino. Laelee. Marcan. L’Anna. Bolehren. Ithikah. Hot Amanakhaton (Jiri). Nedlund. Calme (Auk Sham). Nero.
Venus. Uranus. Sun. Saturn. Neptune. Moon. Mercury. Mars. Jupiter. Gaia. Earth. Air. Fire. Water.
Inner Guide. Senior. Queen. Third. Fourth. Private Oracle. Viru and Maal.
Oliphant. Oroln. Responsibility. RIH. Ronan. Stet. Teks. Sierpienta.
Knight of Wands. Queen of Wands. Prince of Wands. Princess of Wands. Princess of Disks.
Konewa Turi. Bessand Ari. Solar Plexus Chakra. Heart Chakra & Themelians. Throat Chakra. ACKRCK. Crown Chakra.
God. Jesus and Christ. Archangel Michael. Angel of Soul. Formerly Winged Guy. Solar Body. River of Sky.
I imagined I was cohesive energy aligned with the ‘superstring’ of me. I spent awhile willing, commanding, pulling, everything within the span of me, into me, and if it resisted, dissolving the resistance-element of it, and pulling it into alignment. I did this for quite awhile.
I went to the four, HGA and voluntarily aligned my autonomy with theirs-and-god’s. Essentially doing for myself what I was asking of those within. I dedicated my trust, faith, and gratitude for guidance to IG.
I felt nicely combined with the four all the way to the 7th and sat with that awhile.
Then I reviewed the energy-of-me and moved a bunch of energy out of dominance, and a bunch more, mostly from the formerly-winged-guy, into dominance within me. Then I adjusted my perspective as the new-me. I feel ever so slightly more masculine. Perhaps that’s just how I interpret will and determination of which he has a lot and more of that is now part of the new me.
Then I (I-as-greatly-him-now) dissolved the identity properties of the ‘fragment’ alters and their energy. We allowed Amanda as an identity to remain but dissolved a variety of properties inherent in her that are negative and resistant, and made it clear that she will voluntarily integrate or what remains of her identity will be dissolved. We showed her love and forgiveness and suggested she was a lot more than the people who created her understood.
I told IG I wanted to leave the connector within me, as I could feel that there will be much happening over the next few weeks as a sort of follow-on internally, to wrap up this alignment within. She said it would gradually become a part of me, and that is ok.
Then I took a bunch of humic-fulvic minerals and water, as a sort of sealing in the physical.
This took 3.25 hours so obviously was a bit more laborious than it sounds like.