I found this in draft mode from 12/23/2009. Thought I would publish it even though it just makes me sound like a retard.
I have repeatedly been encountering something in both dream and meditative not-sleep states and instantly forgetting it. Geez it bugs me when that happens. It means that I am not ok with it. Usually the first thing that helps me start getting enough brain-handle on something is to give it a label or name. Even if it’s not accurate, it still puts it in the logical-mind category, which ties into some kind of existing belief system or at least association. It’s a foothold, of sorts. I never remember these moments except when I am abruptly realizing I have just ‘forgotten something’ which is the same thing I have forgotten repeatedly.
I’ve been spontaneously thinking more about nature devas lately for some reason.
Maybe it relates. Because early this morning, for just an instant, I realized the thing I was observing, with some level of my mind, was the thing I’ve forgotten innumerable times, and just before my brain “closed down and shut it out”, someone in my head yelled, SPRITES! — as their label. That’s what they are, the things I keep perceiving and closing down. I mean they yelled it at me quickly like to make sure I heard it!
Now I know why I had the odd niggling Deja Vu recently during that movie Avatar in 3D. (You MUST go see that — on the big screen in 3D. It’s one of the few movies worth the theatre cost.) There are these floating ‘seeds’ in that which look vaguely — not a lot, but sorta — like these things. Which I now have no detail on because my brain/memory slammed shut just as the name was being shouted through to me (thanks to whatever guide or aeon helped with that!). In the movie they are like a cross between a faery flower and squid and light being and dandelion puff. There is a sort of commonality, the “very small” and “light-being” and “little puff” and yet it’s an intelligence of some kind.
Why I would be perceiving these, I have no idea. I feel retarded even mentioning it. I did promise myself I would blog experience though.