So I have been thinking off and on about feelings I got during the Water Temple meditation, not all of which unfurled fully at the time, but did so after.
I felt it was a big deal that my Aeons and I were all together, and important that I take my role for them, and make sure all of them are connected with me in my attention before the next meditation.
I realized that we had been approaching the Four. In the Temple. Possibly 4th in focus. The Aeons and I (or rather, I-as-the-composite-of-them) are an Aspect of 4th of 4 and I don’t think I’ve ever experienced them together (at the same time).
I did a cleansing then I went to say hello to each of the chakras. I still feel slightly overwhelmed at Konewa Turi (Kundalini/1st) and not comfortable being physically close. Bessand Ari (2nd) was fine. Kyana Daoen (3rd) I had a lot of humor with, Taan and Ithikah are greatly there and it’s hard not to be of good cheer when I visit. Alayaowaeiiya (4th/heart) was his typical self and I was very admiring and thankful for all that he has helped me with. BUSM (5th) and ACKRCK (6th) and Crown/RCA (7th) I said hello to, and then I was done.
And fell asleep. So set the plan to get back to it before the meditation.
I was ready to meditate end of the night. And then… it was nearly 6am and I was in the same position. I’m guessing I fell asleep but this seems unlikely since I’d slept more than enough. I used to have cycles of meditation where I’d just think about something, the energy would invoke and I was out like unconscious for hours. I guess this is like that.
But I woke up and had work in a couple hours so I had to get to it.
First I did an Aeon round. For each Aeon, working backward around the round, I kissed them, held their hands, and asked: Are you ready? They all said yes. A few of them asked me in return. All of them had their own experience with me different than the others. We put our foreheads together and breathed three times. In almost every case I got some body rushing or several times big energy-yawns.
Then we were in the boat and I put myself in the middle and did a visual of tons of light connections between us, and we floated to the door of the temple. I asked Sun, Third, Monde and Solar Body to join us. The door opened and we moved down that pathway of water toward the front.
I looked around at whatever things were in neat rows all around us. It was hugely tall golden statue guys. Not bright shining like the cloak from previously, but a darker gold. I stared at them, wondering if they were alive, and if they were, how they could stand just standing there for… what could be eons for all I know. They are very patient, I got as an answer with a sense of amusement, but I wasn’t sure who it came from. Along with the secondary sense that time passed a little differently for them.
And then suddenly I had an epiphany of sorts: in 1993-1994, I had a (vision?) I didn’t understand at all. Me and some people were standing in formation in the desert sand, though dressed like normal people, and some big 50′ tall golden egyptian-like statue-guy rose up from the sand in front of us, and put some kind of ‘darkness upon us.’ I didn’t know what the darkness meant, if it was good or bad, other or both.
It made us different though, different than “normal” people who I felt would recognize this and hurt us. We lived in trees and were a lot like fruit bats — the theme of bats was heavy — except human bodied at times which was inconvenient. At one point someone gave me a gem that seemed “fruity” to me, beautifully verdant orange, bit larger on one side than the other in its cut, and I considered eating it due to the ‘fruit’ overlay but understood it was a gem, I couldn’t do that.
I never got the meaning behind that experience. Now suddenly I got it: The people I stood in formation with were my Aeons (who I’d never met at the time). The gem (I did suspect this previously when having another dark-side-queen dream in Death of the Monkeys June/2012) related to second-chakra. (The bats motif is the flipside of the energy of the Queen (2nd of 4).) As for the darkness, I suspect an occultist friend of the time was correct when he said it was probably some knowledge that would be hidden from me for some time.
We passed from the ‘hallway’ created by the super tall statue guys and out into some open water. I could see more than a tiny fraction of the stage now but although aware of the Four’s presence there, and the sense of bright-gold I’d already seen, I couldn’t make anything out. Our boat bumped up against the platform and we were standing on it. A woman came forward that I realized was Fourth.
I can’t remember what was said, only that I realized after a moment it was my job to say it for us so I did.
She invited me forward into this standing ring. It looked like an eqyptian thin circlet for a head, except it was about 8 feet diameter and standing vertically so a little more like a stargate. She had me step into it and stand there, and there was this sense that it was pulling me into a sort of “ring” shape, slightly flattened but thin, around its edges. Then she had the others walk in individually, and each one was pulled into a place sort of on/through me, as if I were studded with them or something.
When they were all in place we slowly began to spin. For some reason this did not result in my feeling like I was being spun around, and I don’t think it did for the Aeons either. It was more the sense that on their part, their… “perspective” was moving around and between the many of them and the motion of their vantage they were very… insightful or wise. Meanwhile, I was sort of the containing ring in a way and I didn’t really feel like I was getting all the information they had, or any of it.
And then I recognized it — again — this is part of that creature the Four and I once became — the one that Ezekiel described, where my Aeons were spinning around beside and below me — it’s just the sense of their eyes, I am the ring that joins them, they came across to him as some odd kind of chariot wheels. My sense of his impression of another band was that it was of light, a property brought on by the spinning and a golden glow, but I’m not sure. In that previous experience, I was ‘with’ 4th’s perception, I was aware of the Aeons but did not perceive what they did. Maybe this explained why. Anyway, I was amazed and baffled that this would be acted out so physically here, but once I “got” it, I knew I was correct.
(My mind boggles at what archetypal imagery this is.)
Then she had us enter a few other shapes where we became other… arrangements is the only way I can put it. I wondered if one was the creature the Four and I became one day that was kind of exciting energy but I knew would be utterly terrifying to humans, that felt like so much jagged edges, and I think it was light but it just came across as teeth and fire I think. I don’t know, though.
Then we were standing together again. She took off a bright golden cloak and threw it over the top of us and it spun above us and landed as if it were powder, and all of us were gradually covered. As if it had become the very surface of our skin texture and hair and everything (which is how the ‘darkness’ had been in that experience prior), with this sort of dark gold powder. I realized that we were going to look like those tall guys, well if you don’t count that we aren’t fifty feet tall.
I wonder if all the guys standing in formation watching this were the many Aeons of the Aspects of the Four, actually. Hmmn.
I wish I could remember what she (4th) said. It was something about… we were one with her now. Like it was official.
And then I was aware in my room, and I thought I had fallen out of the meditation, so I forced myself back into it imaginatively but got kicked out again. So that was it. She dismissed us, I guess!