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I found these quotes.

The term “Aeon” means “self-existent one” or “ever-existing entity.”

I had never heard of that use of the word, when the Consortium/Coalition I initially referred to as “Guides,” that kept introducing themselves — and IG kept forcing that — said they were Aeons.  And I didn’t  really grok how a ‘measure of time’ could also be the description of them, but they seemed to think that time was part of their definition as well as anything else.

I admit that I’m still sort of astounded that googling the term turned up some ‘ancient gnostic reference’ to the term used to describe some kind of spiritual entity. That seems so validating! Yet still confusing that the detail seems very… ‘off’ from mine. Not like just something else, but like there is some confusion. Maybe it’s me, my insecurity says.

Let alone the story of ‘waking up’ one of the ‘four aeons of light’ who had been hidden away from something called the Archons — the brief description was definitely parallel to my experience with the 3rd of 4; this has to be talking about the same thing. Except I never called the four “Aeons.” Just Elementals of Soul. Er, someone else’s soul, in case that isn’t clear — we are 4 elements of a larger identity. And yet although we seem separate, I am ‘contained’ in the 3rd, and he in the 2nd, and I suppose she in the Senior — we are more like Russian nested dolls than four wholly separate entities. And he showed me the four panels of light for us, but maybe I’m misinterpreting it.

I’m confused. Sure, there are some of my Aeons that could potentially be pretty glorious, maybe. Ithikah and Nedlund I know little of but seem powerful.  Nero and Calme seem very evolved (for lack of a better word). All the others are clearly ‘wise spiritual entities’. But they seem like — well, like “other people” to me.

I grant: Calme is not a person (she came across as a short faery-like creature initially but then implied she was something that when googled, turned out to be an extinct oversized bird from the Celt regions… now I don’t know what to think!…), and I admit it’s a little weird that Jared and El Nino are literally a shared-energy albeit separated and one’s a horse… and I only recently got that Hot Amanakhaton was a person not the huge golden statue I perceive him as but now ‘see through’. More than once I’ve had the visuals/associations with space/stars/galaxy with the Aeons, implying that this is related — so I wonder, you know, if there are 12, does that make it the zodiac or something? No clue.

But still, the point is — these identities are about as holy as I am and as the tarot ‘energy-conglomerate-identities’ are, I think. OK maybe I’m just too stupid to see how evolved they really are. YES they are way way smarter than me spiritually but then, we are operating on ‘that level’ and for all I know, they all have ordinary lives — such as Jared and I shared (or seem to have) back in the Roman era sometimes. Maybe we all operate as each others’ Aeons on some inner level but that doesn’t mean they aren’t just people or entities “like me” to some degree.

I admit it still really confuses me that they have presented as “they compose me” because to my tiny brain that means they are each 1/12 of me and I am somehow 12x bigger, somehow, than any of them. That doesn’t really seem to be the case though.

Anyway but they do not seem to me to be any ‘more’ god-like or eternal than anybody else.

I can only conclude that maybe there are many different levels of this… role or job title ‘Aeon’. I guess what the refs to Gnostic stuff are talking about, is somehow way above whatever I am experiencing. I wish I could stumble into someone talking about stuff like I get. I wish my left brain were not so neurotic and self-invalidating that it keeps sporadically searching for that.

Anyway. If they are ‘eternal’ like that quote says, well, so is everyone I guess. I don’t see them as different. And if they are, like if they are not in human form anymore and they are more ‘evolved’ or something (that term always makes me think of the new age field and my eyes roll up in my head), then still — I figure that’s a path any of us might be on, and if they’re already there, so what.

There are a multitude of these beings in Gnostic thought and the reader may think of them as “gods,” god-like beings or super-angelic spiritual beings.

See, whatever they’re talking about there, despite my tendency to see ‘the divine’ in things especially lately as my archmeds show, I just don’t see these guys as gods.

Maybe in some framework, if they are not-manifest, and they communicate and are wise, it could be called that, if ‘spiritual entity’ qualifies as a type of god to some people. Small “g”. But in MY pantheon, they are just… them.

One of the difficulties in understanding Gnosticism is this plurality of names of the Aeons. To make things even more complex, some names are used to refer to more than one Aeon.

Well my Aeons ‘blend’, sometimes indistinguishably, sometimes as ‘more a % of X and a little of Y’. Plus it’s possible that the structure like the 4 might go on with everyone including each Aeon. This could make it all pretty confusing, identity-wise.

And to make things still more complex, each of the major Gnostic teachers had a different scheme or genealogy of Aeons.

Maybe it is literally different for each of them. Maybe it’s different for me. Maybe that’s what’s missed here, is the realization that mystics have unique internal identities. The attempt to “doctrinize” this and make it the same for everyone may be the problem.

***

I assume that if this is true for me — and experientially, subjectively, it all certainly is — that it must be normal. I mean, I am a little weird but I am just not that special compared to anybody else. So if I am one of 4 elementals of soul, as I called them initially, then I assume everybody reading this is, too. Although maybe there are different roles (not everyone is the 4th, and maybe the gender could be either and just happens to match my body in this case).

The more I recently thought about the ‘5th Element’ movie the more I felt it was a story of the 3rd searching for his love the 2nd, like the first time I met the Queen when the 3rd dug her up, figuratively — the fellow who wrote that story/movie began it in his head when he was a late teen, I once read. Maybe he also has the Four, he is just a different role, and maybe he isn’t conscious of it in quite the way I am, yet he did a nice job of creatively manifesting all that energy/relationship, and on a mass scale, too,  given he got it made into a major movie.

I feel CS Lewis’s Narnia is an exploration of the primary energies and relationships of the Four, his in that case, though with some parameters given it was essentially children’s books.

I don’t know why I see only these few ‘echoes’. None of my friends have this stuff, the Four I mean. But you know, maybe they don’t need it. Maybe they are able to be spiritual and exploring in 1001 ways that me with my doubting left-brain and major denial and forgetful problems just can’t do, and this is one of the few things that I _could_ do. Maybe the Four are like some spiritual version of the ‘Accessible’ room. (Is that more short-bus jokes? ;-))  Hmmn. The 3rd actually seemed to pick that up. He does not feel that is… appropriate.

Some people have no sense of humor.

P